Revealed: The worst things to hear on the first tee

We’d all do anything for a game of golf – but sometimes what you hear on the first tee strikes fear into your heart.

Whether it’s an unwelcome update on the course conditions or admissions from your playing partners, there are quite a few things we’d rather not have to hear.

We’ve compiled a list of some of the worst – but remember to let us know what you hate to hear too.

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“I’m not up for a full 18 today”

There’s nothing worse when you’ve got your round mapped out and one of your playing partners comes out with this. Most courses have 18 holes – if you’re not going to use them all, is there really any point?

“Anyone got a spare ball/tee/pencil?”

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail. If you’re turning up without these essential items, you’re setting yourself up for a miserable round as well as getting on your playing partners’ wick.

“I’ve been playing so badly recently”

Really? Well I haven’t, so keep it to yourself. This one is normally immediately followed by 47 stableford points.

“I’ve been playing well recently”

As above, saying this is guaranteed to rile your playing partners. It also makes you look daft when you sign for an 87.

“I need to shoot X to get cut”

The advent of general play scores has caused such incidents to increase exponentially. If you’re putting this much pressure on yourself before you’ve hit a ball, it probably isn’t going to happen.

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“I haven’t hit a ball in ages”

Is there anything more annoying than playing with someone who says this, then proceeds to crush one? If there is, we’re yet to hear it.

“The greens have been spiked”

Look, we get it. It’s essential to keep the course in top condition. But that doesn’t make the feeling of a putt tracking all the way, only to bounce away at the last moment, any less painful.